I'm having a mixed feeling tonight..When I found out that I am not pregnant, my world falls down into pieces... Shattered and cant explain why i really feel devastated...

Me and My Husband were waiting and expecting this baby... We are married for 7 months and keep on trying to have a baby. Followed our friends' advises. I resigned from my work as I am having a too much pressure and thinking that one of the reasons why we're not having a baby is because I am so stressed from my work. I am off at my work since November 30, 2007... But still, nothing's happen.

I was actually delayed for 3 days today, and we claiming that "YES!! I AM PREGNANT!" and looking forward to upcoming days but night comes and here I am, facing at my computer, writing a blog and having a deep depression..

Whenever I saw my husband, whenever I look at him while he's sleeping, though he says "OK", I know, deep inside of him, is a feeling of sadness and regrets.. If I could only do something.. If I could only wipe and wash away the distressed he's feeling, I will.. but reality says I CANNOT.

But of course, at the end of this line, I know, God has it's reason behind.. What it is??? I dont know... I may not know tonight or tomorrow or on the coming days but soon, He'll tell and show me why...

And as I always pray and lifting up to him.. "GOD , I AM JUST YOUR PASSENGER AND YOU ARE MY DRIVER... WHATEVER PLANS YOU HAD MADE FOR ME AND MY HUSBAND, FOR OUR FAMILIES, I LIFT THEM UP TO YOU LORD... WHATEVER HEARTS DESIRES WE HAVE IN OUR HEARTS, BLESS IT OH LORD.. HOLD OUR HANDS TIGHTER AND DONT LOOSEN IT UP... CONTINUE TO TOUCH OUR HEARTS AND STRENGTHEN OUR FAITH. WE LIFT EVERYTHING TO YOU OH LORD, OUR GOD, OUR SAVIOR, OUR PROTECTOR AND OUR GUIDE "